twothousandandseven

2007 In The Beginning...

Where did you bring in the New Year?:
At my mom's church. They had a New Years Eve service.

Who were you with?:
The pentecostals.

Did you kiss anyone at midnight?:
Definitely not.

Did you make any resolutions?:
No.

2007 Your Love Life...


Did you break up with anyone?:
We weren't dating, but it was worse than a breakup.

Did you get anything for Valentine's day?:
A hersheys kiss rosebud from Miss Pizzuti.

Did you meet anyone special?:
Yeah.

Did you fall in love?:
Yes.

Are you still in love?:
No.

2007 Friends and Enemies...


Did you meet any new friends this year?:
Meagan, Cass, Josh, Kristen, Hayden, Philip, Mel, Grayson, Hayley, and a ton more.

Did any of your friendships end?:
Not really end, but I've grown apart from a lot of people.

Did you dislike anyone?:
Yeah.

Did you make any new enemies?:
Probably.

Did you resolve any fights?
Yeah.

Who were your closest friends?:,
Kristen, Meagan, Rachel, Courtney, Denton, Susan, Cass, Ashley, Eishlay

Who did you grow apart from?:
Andrea.

Do you have any regrets when it comes to your friendships?:
Not really. I regret not making up with some people.

2007 Your BIRTHDAY!!!


How old did you turn?:
18.

Did you have cake?
Yeah.

What did you do for your birthday?
I met a lot of my friends at waffle house, but I don't really remember much of it.

Did you have a party?:
Yeah, we had a bonfire, and roasted hotdogs and marshmallows.

Did you get any presents?:
Mostly money.

If so what was the best thing you got:
I got to spend time with my closest friends.

2007 All about you...


Did you change at all this year?:
Yeah, for the better i guess.

Did you dye your hair?:
Nope.

Did you get your hair cut?
Yeah.

Did you change your style?:
Not really.

Were you in school?:
Yeah.

Did you get good grades:
Mostly, this past semester has been rough though.

Did you have a job?:
Yeah over the summer, but I quit.

Did you drive?:
All the time.

Did you own a car?:
'99 Ford Ranger.

Did anyone close to you give birth?:
Becca Bradshaw.

Did you move at all?:
No.

Did you go on any vacations?:
Mostly small trips to Charleston, Myrtle Beach, Folly Beach, and Edisto. Went with the family to the mountains twice.

Did you leave the country at all?:
Nope.

Would you change anything about yourself now?:
No.

2007.....Wrap Up.


Is 2007 a good year?:
I've had some bad times, but overall it's been amazing.

Did 2007 bring any new insights?:
Definitely.

Do you think 2008 will top 2007?:
Most definitely.

Do you have any goals for 2008?:
Get a job, save up some money, open a bank account, get a better cell phone provider, pay my own bills, move out, make it into the School of Music at USC, and a ton more.
I think I'm going to make a master list.

If you could relive any moment which would you choose?:
Any of the after hours dance parties. Those have been fun.

We're just tired of changing like seasons

So, I'm writing this right now, because it's 5.30 in the morning, and I don't think I'll ever do it if I don't do it now. So here goes. Tonight was super fun, and I don't think much could compare, and you probably would have had to have been there. And you probably were.
So, Secret Lives was amazing. Better than I could've ever dreamed. Through their whole set, the whole crowd was like a mob, and I honestly can't think of a better word to describe it right now than amazing. You would've thought that they were Jesus or something, by the response from everyone. It was an incomparable experience.
So, after that some stuff happened and I ended up at waffle pernty with Courtney, Denton, Haley, Meagan, Cass, Josh, a girl I just met [who goes to my school but i've never met before... wierd.] named Rachel, ironically. So we're all at waffle house, which was fun as always. Everyone ends up leaving except for me and Mel, and of course Charlie was there with his friends, so we ended up sitting outside waffle pernty listening to Charlie on some crazy instrument like a banjo? and Mel on guitar, singing and everything was just perfect, and I closed my eyes, listening to them singing and the music, and remembered that this is what I live for. Nothing more, nothing less.
I love these times.

Attraversiamo

I just flipped through Eat. Pray. Love and read all of the quotes that I underlined, and cried.
I think it's time I read that book again.
It would be good for me.

"There's nothing you can ever do to lose my love. I will protect you until you die, and after your death I will still protect you. I am stronger than Depression and I am braver than Loneliness and nothing will ever exhaust me."

I'm dreaming

of a white Christmas...

This has by far been the most eventful Christmas I've ever had. I've felt every emotion there is and all for different reasons. I've gone from being apathetic yesterday about the whole holiday, and not being in the Christmas spirit, to feeling genuinely sick for how corrupt everything has become. I've spent time with people who are family but not friends, and people who are so close to me that they basically are family. Family in a good way. I've felt greedy and spoiled, and been humbled. I've been brought to the verge of tears knowing that some of my really close friends are spending Christmas alone, not with family or friends. And knowing that I can't be with them because I'm spending time with my own family. I've felt really small the past few days because of the multitude of emotions that have consumed me. I haven't really had time to sit and contemplate, or talk to anyone about any of this. I spent my Christmas Eve with family who are distant from me, feeling like an outsider in my own grandparent's house. These are people who can't tell each other 'I love you' without feeling awkward. After that, i was somewhat depressed. After opening presents at the house this morning, we went to my other grandparents house, which is on the whole other side of the spectrum. We ate really good food, and talked a lot. Grandma read the Christmas story out of the bible to all of us, like she always does. And everything felt perfect then, in that one moment. I've received more gifts than I deserved, and been humbled by it, because I didn't really get a whole lot of anything, and I know that there are a lot of people who got less for Christmas than I did. All this is too much, I need simplicity right now.
I've learned a lot this Christmas season, and I continue to be humbled by it. Every Christmas, receiving presents have meant a little less to me, and spending time with the people I love has meant a little more. I'm growing to realize that no matter who you are, Christmas should be about family and friends, and spending time with the people you love. Gifts are nice, and I appreciate everything I received, but I'm more thankful for the time I've gotten to spend with my friends and family. I've spent time with close family, and even closer friends. Tonight I went to waffle house with Meagan, Cass, Josh, and Haydn. I'm growing to love these kids more and more each day, and they're becoming big parts of my life. These are the people who I live with. I live day by day, hanging out with them, and spending time with them. It's almost too good to be true. I love my friends more than anything, and I wouldn't change them for the world. I'm genuinely content where I am right now. I feel alive, and loved, and infinite, more often than not, and that's a good feeling.
I live for this, to live, love, and be loved.
I live for these moments.
I couldn't have asked for a better experience than the one I've had this Christmas. I hope I never forget it, and I hope I never forget that above everything, love is what Christmas boils down to,
and recognizing the people who mean the world to you.

Will you regret?

Yesterday I asked my mom if when I move out, if I never go back to church, will she regret pushing me to go to church to the point that the thought of it disgusts me.
And she said no. No, she's not going to regret pushing me to go to a church that is so similar to a cult, that it's scary. She's not going to regret forcing this all down my throat. She's not going to regret any of this because she's brainwashed. There are some things going on in that church that I'm not ok with, and if it was up to me right now, I would never go back there. She's brainwashed to the point where she, along with everyone else in that church, thinks that the pastor is a prophet of God. He stops in the middle of sermons, and says things like "oh, thank you lord. the lord just told me..." I'm sorry but the bible says that we aren't supposed to just agree with someone because they teach the bible, we're supposed to question them, and look for answers on our own. But that church has corrupted so many people that when they read the bible, they don't even see it for what it is anymore, they read a verse, and remember what "pastor david" said about that verse. They don't make their own opinions about things, they adopt his. There is something very wrong with that man. I told my mom that I would go to that church every week, twice a week, if she let me leave after worship. Because the worship there is amazing. Everyone sings, and people close their eyes and lift their hands, and during worship is the only time I feel God's presence. After that the pastor goes up and starts talking about how God wants us to give our money so we can receive. It's all about giving so we can get. "I'm going to give $250 to the church today, because I know I need a lot of money next week, and if I give to the church, I'll receive even more." Give, receive. Give, receive. I'm sick of this fucking complicated Christianity and the corrupted views people are teaching about the bible. I refuse to take seriously any preacher who is a self-proclaimed prophet of God.

REAAL sticky icky.

So, I just got my wisdom teeth removed, and it sucks really bad. They put me on laughing gas when they were doing it, so I listened to Regina while the whole thing was going on. It was kindof funny. I'm numb in wierd spots like the roof of my mouth and my bottom lip. Oh yeah, and my cheeks. This is so wierd though. The numbing medicine they gave me is starting to wear off, so I'm hoping these pain pills that I took earlier will kick in pretty soon, because otherwise i might pass out or something. My tongue feels like it's swollen to the size of a banana and it's the wierdest thing I've ever experienced. That's not true, but that's a different story. I think I'm gonna go take a nap now.

Smeared black ink

Rachel is about to fly to Vegas for like... a week, and I don't think I'm going to get to see her before she leaves. Maybe I'll go meet her at the airport before she goes. This week has been really fun, but I'm glad that it's over. Next week is my last week at school before winter break, which is real exciting! I'm really hoping that I'll get to go on a roadtrip to the beach or somewhere before we start back school. I'm really impressed with my new Macbook, I love it! Maybe one day I'll use it for something constructive. It's really late, what am I doing awake? My sleeping schedule is way off.

For the widows in paradise

So, last night I was laying in bed trying to sleep, but I couldn't stop thinking. Mainly about happiness. I've always tried not to let circumstances determine how happy I am, but what about possessions? What if everyone in the world had everything they wanted? Would that make us all happier, or would it make things worse.
What kind of world would this be if nobody had any possessions to work for. What if everyone got everything they wanted, and then realized that they were more content just having what they had initially. What would someone think, if he received everything he had ever wanted, and then realized that he still wasn't happy.
What then? Would the world be a better place if everyone stopped working to get everything they want, and just sat down and became content with the way things are. At what point does materialism become over the top? When a whole world of people are all working to get what they want, and once they get one thing, they find another thing to work towards. Is it actually possible for a person to be completely content, wanting nothing, realizing that he doesn't have everything he could, but being ok with that?
I know that everyone has wants, but at what point does it become ridiculous? At what point do you stop and say, hey- this is enough. I've kind of strayed away from my original question, but really, what would happen to the world if everyone had only what they needed. No more, no less. Could the world be content with that.
I don't even know if I could be content with that. I'm always wanting something, something more. Have I become so brainwashed that I've started to think that the only way to be happy is through possessions? I don't want to live bound to materialism like this, I want to live, knowing that if I lost everything I own, I would still have more than most people ever dream of. I want my entire life to be measured not in what I accomplish or what I own, but who I'm friends with, and what amazing times I've had with them. I want to die with my memories, not worrying what I'm leaving behind.
What if we were all content. What would that kind of world look like?

It's almost 2am

which really means that it's almost 1am,
because time is about to change.

It's times like these you learn to live again

Tonight was amazing. We had a bonfire, and Me, Kristen, Jordan, Meagan, Susan, Keith, and Lindsay sat out there and talked, and watched the fire, and roasted marshmallows, and it was just awesome.

I have the most amazing friends in the world, and I wouldn't give them up for the world.

I.love.Kristen.Albert.endofstory.

The minor fall and the major lift

Ok, so here's what happened yesterday, which turned out to be the most awesome day I've had in a long time, not to say I haven't had good days, this one was just incomparable.
I took Care home at 5ish and then went to piano lessons, which were actually productive. Met Rachel at the bean after I left piano, and we hung out there until she left, and then I stayed until they closed talking to Brandon and Grayson, and listening to them play guitar, and sing, and hanging out, it was all just really fun.
I went straight from there to Cass's, who wasn't home for some still unknown reason, so i called Kristen and walked around the neighborhood with her until Cass and Meagan and Josh and Kristen got home, and we all stood outside with Kristen's dad [who came outside looking for her], when this drunk girl walked up and started talking to us, which was really awkward, and we all got quiet when she walked over, and apparently they know her, because she lives in their neighborhood, but it was really weird. And then Kristen and her dad went inside, and we all went to waffle house, and Meg was our waitress and we ate hamburgers and waffles, and drank lots of coffee. When we left there it was only about 2am probably, Kristen and Josh rode with Cass, who was driving Meagan's car and Me and Meagan were in my truck, and we went and got Grant and Hayden, who rode with Cass, and we all went to the new Walmart, where a cop followed us around the store for about an hour, which got really awkward, so we left.
About that time, we decided we wanted to go swimming, so we drove to the dam, and parked at that public boatramp place, and me and Hayden and Josh went swimming in our boxers, and they stole our clothes and put them in the girls bathroom, and told us there were cops pulling up next to our cars, and it was all a big mess, and there turned out to really be a cop parked next to my truck, but he didn't care that we were there. After we left there [which actually was right after we realized there was a cop parked next to my truck] we went back to Cass's and hung out for about another hour before I came home at 5.
Oh yeah, and ontop of all of that, me and Meagan were listening to Cass's cd in my truck the whole time, which had a screamo version of Soldier Boy on it.
I really don't think that's how you spell that.

amazing.

Good News.

My meeting with Rosemarie went well. I played some piano for her, and she critiqued me, and told me everything I wanted to believe from the start. I want to be a piano major, at college. Any college. But a good college. Preferably Boston Music Conservatory. Which isn't a completely ridiculous goal, apparently, and it's supposedly not extremely difficult to get in.
These things are exciting to me.
I'm probably going to start taking lessons with one of the head music professors at the School of Music, and I'm going to push myself farther than I thought possible. And I'm going to play harder music than I've ever played before.
And I'm going to live the music that I play.

But first I should probably go do the homework that I've been pushing off all week [in order to practice for hours on end, of course... I hope you think I'm kidding].

I should probably conquer some ridiculous Bach Fugue next.

I'll be

the fire escape
that's bolted to the ancient brick
where you will sit
and contemplate your day.

I've really enjoyed these past few days, staying up until the wee hours of the morning, talking on the phone with you about everything that's going on, and contemplating our lives. Despite everything we've been through, and all the crap we've put each other through, I really enjoy being friends with you.

So long sweet summer

It's really sad that tomorrow is my last day of summer. I'm going to try to make the best of it, but I should probably go buy my summer reading book instead.

I really have no idea where I'm going to college,
but Rachel and I are going together. Because we both want to be music majors,
so whichever school we decide is the best, and most reasonable,
that's where we're going to go.

"If we go away, we go away together."

We're thinking a music conservatory somewhere like Boston or Chicago.
That's quite possibly the most ridiculous idea I've ever seriously considered.
It doesn't sound that bad though.

I should probably have a remote idea where I want to go to college before i start my senior year in high school, but oh well. I guess I still have plenty of time to think about that.
But all I know, is that music is my passion, and it always has been, and always will be,
and that Rachel and I are in the same boat, so we're going to have each other through everything. We might be in a completely different city from anything we've ever seen, but we'll have each other.

I'm going to be a Piano major.

I have a bunch of things to do tomorrow, most of which are going to be less that enjoyable.

I should practice tomorrow too, brush up on my rusty violin skills. I haven't picked up my cello since the Maggie Cafferty benefit...
I fail at life.


I aspire to be a starving musician.

So we can stay like this forever

and we'll never miss a party,
cuz we'll keep them going constantly.

I can't believe how fast this summer has gone by. I really shouldn't be surprised, because summers always go by really quick for me, but I think I can honestly say this has been my best summer ever. I've been going to Waffle House a lot, with Kristen, Cass, and Jordan, and that has been probably the most fun part of this summer for me. We've been going at all hours of the night, just to hang out, and drink coffee. We've made friends with a lady Jamie that works there, and she always waits on us. They're never busy at like... 2am, so she sits down and talks to us. Waffle Has basically become our thing to do, and I love it.

HOKAY, so im REAL excited. I just found out today that our quartet is playing in a wedding Saturday and the rehersal dinner Friday night. So we're practising at Rachel's Thursday night, and probably practising Friday before the rehersal dinner, and definitely Saturday before the wedding. And on top of all of that Rachel and I are playing with Mel Washington Band Sunday night, and we have to practice with them sometime inbetween practicing for the wedding. So basically... from Thursday night to Sunday night, I'm going to be engulfed in music.
And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Did you ever think that you would be this blessed?

Is it completely ridiculous

to post two blogs within about an hour of each other?
I guess thats not really my point.

you're brought back but you're running
I'll find sleep in the end tonight
I can't shake this little feeling
I'll never get anything right

I think I've had enough time now to be able to say honestly what's been bothering me so much lately. I've been thinking a lot, about too many things, and some people have noticed that something was bothering me. But really up until now, I didn't even know. And I'm still trying to sort a lot of things out myself. But at least now I have a start.
First of all, there's a lot of things that I've kindof just ignored and pushed to the side, and it's been ok until now, but I have to face those things now. Not necessarily in a bad way, but it's come to a point where I've pushed so much to the side, that it's all piled up now and waiting for me. I've tried to forget so many things, but I haven't taken the time to sit down and sort them out for myself. I have all these things now, piled up, and they're all pulling me in a million different directions, and I just haven't known what to do, or that there was anything that needed to be done, for that matter. I guess this is a part of growing up, and I've got so much to think about. I have to be honest with myself in all of these situations, and that's going to be hard for me, but the hardest thing out of all of this, is letting go. Because there's so many of those things that I haven't taken the time to deal with, and up until now i've thought it ok to push them aside, but I have to let go of things. Things that are in the past, that I thought I was ok with. Situations i don't have any closure in, but I thought were resolved. Honestly, I just don't know what to do, but I'm going to try my hardest to settle things for myself. I don't really know what spurred this all, but once again, I guess that's not the point. I've been really indecisive about a lot lately, and I've depended too much on everyone else's point of view to the point that mine has become basically nonexistant. I feel like I'm about to blindfold myself and run full speed through rush hour traffic. I just don't even know where to start, and even if I did, where do I go from there? I just don't even know. All I know is that there are a lot of things I need to think long and hard about and decide if they're worth persuing. I feel like I've been giving a hundred and fifty percent into every, and it's finally catching up with me. I just need to let go of a lot of things. I need to accept the past for what it is, and I need to work on moving foward with my life.

So take the photographs and still frames in your mind,
Hang them on a shelf in good health and good time.

I hope that all of this has made the slightest bit of sense.

but I am too weak to be your cure.

Is this the way a toy feels when its batteries run dry?

This just seems to fit.




You don't know me, you don't even care
You don't know me, you don't wear my chains

She said I think I'll go to Boston
I think I'll start a new life
I think I'll start it over, where no one knows my name
I'll get out of California, I'm tired of the weather
I think I'll get a lover and fly em out to Spain
I think I'll go to Boston
I think that I'm just tired
I think I need a new town, to leave this all behind
I think I need a sunrise, I'm tired of the sunset
I hear it's nice in the Summer, some snow would be nice
Boston, where no one knows my name

Spent a lot of my time trying to make this alright,

I hope this is all that you wanted.

So I'm in an incredibly wierd mood. I stayed up late last night, after a night out with Eish and Dallas. We went to Waffle House, after a little hiking, if you could call it that. Nevertheless, it was fun. Anyways, today I woke up really late, and drank like... 4 cups of coffee at work, to stay alive of course. And I have no idea what I'm doing. I think this is the most pointless blog ever, because I've never felt more indecisive than I do right now about how my life's going. I have no idea what's wrong with me.

Maybe I'm just tired.
I hear sleep is a good cure for pointless rambling, but for some reason I'm not tired. I mean, i could've killed over and died earlier, because the thermostat for the kitchen at work... was set to 87, and I was super tired.
But now, for some reason, I'm not tired.
And for some reason, I think you care.

Road Trip?

I really need to get away from this house. My mom is driving me crazy, and I feel kindof dumb wanting to leave again, when I haven't even been back from the beach for a week, but I dont think it's this house, it's just my mom. I have lost all respect I ever had for her, not that I had much to begin with. She's just been really psychotic lately, but I guess that goes for everybody's parents. I really just want to drive somewhere, just get a few people, and take my truck on the interstate, and have no idea where we're going, but go, and drive until we feel like coming home.

Throw it away
Forget yesterday
We'll make the great escape
We won't hear a word they say
They don't know us anyway

White Chocolate Rasberry Frio

"No, heaven's not a place that you go when you die,
It's that moment in life when you actually feel alive.
So live for the moment
And take this advice, live by every word,
Love's completely real, so forget anything that you've heard
And live for the moment now."

And tonight will go on forever,

While we walk around this town like we own the streets,
and stay awake through summer like we own the heat.

I really have a lot to think about and sort and get out of my head before i go insane. I havent had internet for the past month and we finally got it fixed. Im not even going to try to paraphrase everything thats happened in the past month because i really dont see it as that important right now. Graduation was really hard for me to swallow, and i keep thinking that everything will be fine next year. hopefully ill convince myself of that eventually. Ive really had a hard time with it though, because I was thinking about it, and i realized that all of my friends are older than me, and they're all going off to college. Rachel is basically my other half, and she's going to be in chicago. Ive been thinking a lot lately about my friends, and what they mean to me, and I can honestly say that I would die without them. Its going to be extremely hard on me next year at school, but i know that all of this will be ok in the end, because i'll find ways to see everyone, and ill find time to spend with all of these people that mean the world to me.

On another note, I've also been thinking lately about this summer and what I really want to acomplish. Im playing in a few weddings with Rachel, Emi, and Dalton. And hopefully me and Jamie will be playing a show in the watershed soon, we've been working on some songs on guitar and cello. I have a job, and that means money, so roadtrips are essential, to the beach, or wherever. I dont know if roadtrips really count as accomplishments.

After work today I got to talk to Susan Courtney and Jamie, and Susan and Jamie came over to play some music, which ended up in about an hour of music, and about another 2 hours talking, both of which i really needed, musically and emotionally.
Honestly, I've been an emotional wreck lately. Ive found that these times when i just get to sit and talk with some of my really good friends, are the times when im truly happy, and those are the times when i really have a chance to think about life, and everything that's gone on lately, and sort things out. Nothing really bad has happened lately, I think it kindof sounds like thats what im getting at, but its not. I've just been so busy and I haven't had near enough time to stop and think about anything.

I really want to make the most of this summer, when i still can get together with everyone, and go to the beach, or the lake, or just hang out.

I think thats all.

Good news:

So I am officially not grounded anymore and that makes me really excited because I can have a life again.
Actually I just realized I've only been grounded since Monday morning when I gave mom my interims, but it's seemed like wayyy longer, because I haven't really gotten to talk to anyone outside of school. So here's how my week went. Monday I sat around, and did basically nothing, I moved my room around, because I really had nothing better to do. Im glad I had my Ipod though, because if my mom gets to where she takes phone, computer, and ipod, well i think ill just die. At least she cant take my piano, it's in my room. Anyways, Tuesday my mom did let me go to the Philharmonic because it's one of their last performances before summer, and Kristen went with me. Mary Lee Taylor never ceases to amaze me. I dont think anything important happened Wednesday. Thursday was crazy. I got my hair cut right after school, went home and practiced for like... 30 minutes, went to piano lessons, went to cello lessons, came home, studied, and went to bed. Friday was solo and ensemble. Me and Rae played the cello duet that I wrote, and we got a superior! Ok, after that, Courtney rode with me to the Wired Bean, and we met up with Rachel, Meagan, Chris, and Denton. And I got to see Hayley again, and meet Mel and Grayson. And Me, Courtney, Chris, Grayson, Denton, Rachel, and Meagan sat out on the dam at the pond. And it hurts my brain to say everyone's name like that, and to think at all, because I just took the SAT. But I think that's all of the eventful things that've happened this week. I got to spend time with possibly my two favorite people in the world, Courtney and Rachel, and Im really glad of that.

I'm surrounded softly by the beat

So I just got back from the Baumer show at NBT and it was amazing. I dont think anyone forgets their first time at New Brookland, and I hope not, because I dont ever want to forget this. Yes it was my first time there, I guess that's kindof pathetic, but oh well. I had a really great time, and i got to hang out with Courtney and Chris, and meet lots of cool people. And i got to dance and jump around with everyone, and probably make a complete idiot of myself, but I dont really care. Because everybody was just jumping around and having a good time. And I basically cant even think right now, because I havent had enough sleep, or enough coffee to balance out my lack of sleep. And I'm really tired from just dancing and stuff. And its really late and I think Im rambling, but oh well. I think Im going to bed because it's like... 2am, and I need sleep.

Dearest Mother.

Chain me up.
And blindfold me,
And dont let me see the light of day,
And spoon feed me your religion,
And tell me right from wrong.

Because that's going to solve everything.

It's not nearly late enough

for me to be saying that it's too late for me to be awake. It's only 11.45. I desperately need sleep. I dont think anyone has any idea how ready I am for it to be summer. I dont care if that means that I have to stop being a bum and get a job. Hopefully I could get a fun job. Something I would enjoy, somthing to do with music maybe. My plans for this summer are to go to the beach as much as possible, get a job that wont interfere with my sanity, read as much as possible, keep playing my cello and violin and piano all the freaking time, and spend as much time as possible with my friends. I basically can't wait. I'm sooooo excited about this summer, and hopefully I'll get to take a trip to some really cool place in the midst of all of that. This kind of thinking is not helping me concentrate on school.

Not good.

So i just found out that im failing Chemistry with a 63, History with a 66, and i have a 76 in Geometry. So apparently Im not working hard enough. And i have to work my ass off for the rest of the year. Im deffinitely ready for summertime. But Im basically going to be studying for the rest of forever, until I get my grades back up. But on a better note, I dont know if I've mentioned this yet, but I might be auditioning for the Lake Murray Symphony Orchestra soon. Ill play cello, because Bob said they need cellos. But hopefully that will work out for me. I dont really know if Im capable, because they play stuff that the Philharmonic plays, like... really hard music. Im sure I could do it with enough practice.

I had forgotten how vital these kinds of things are to my sanity

I went to see the Lake Murray Symphony Orchestra today with Dr. Moskovitz as the pianist and Dr. Pruitt as the first chair cellist. I don't even know how to describe how amazing the music was. They played Romanian Folk Dances, and Russian Easter Overture, and Dr. Moskovitz played the piano with them for a Liszt Concerto. The whole thing was just refeshing. Backtracking, we had an amazing weekend at Myrtle Beach. We got there Thursday night, and performed Friday morning, so we got that out of the way, and we really just relaxed the rest of the weekend. I got to lay out and read by the pool, and drink an unhealthy amount of coffee, and shop until I felt like my legs were going to give out underneath me. So i guess that makes it a good trip right? I really enjoyed it, a lot. This whole weekend has just been really refreshing, because I love music, and I love the beach, so what better combination could there be? Susan read me some parts of a book by Chuck Klosterman when we were sitting by the pool at the hotel, so I think thats the next book I'm going to read, because it sounded really good, it's one of those books that really makes you think. That's all though, because I have homework that I can't afford to not do.

Yay prom pictures. Just a few though, because im lazy.









And this was after prom...

Yes, we had lots of fun.

So Im really excited about this weekend! Myrtle Beach, and I get to see Andrea and Care and Eish at Broadway at the beach, and Andrea turns 18 Saturday! Ahhhh im so excited.
It is going to be a good weekend.

Deffinitely the most pointless thing ever.

So i was on at the same time yesterday, but i'm not going to stay up all night tonight. I'm on the phone with Eishlay, and we're just talking. Mhmm. so this is pointless basically, but oh well. I started reading "Stoner and Spaz" today, and it's basically amazing. I've been reading a lot lately, like... craving books, which i guess is a good thing. I can't wait until this thursday, we're going to myrtle beach! It's gonna rock. I really wish i was going with Andi and Care and Eish, for Andi's bday, but oh well. I'm glad i'm going to the beach nevertheless.
im in a really good mood.
yay.

Look who got a blog.

So idk what to start this out with. I think this will be good for me though, because its been a while since ive had a blog. Im drinking white chocolate macadamia nut coffee right now, and procrastinating doing my geometry homework, which is pretty pathetic seeing how its like... 1 in the morning. I had fun at prom. Im kindof in a wierd mood right now, and a lot lately actually. Idk though, its hard to explain. I think someone should tell me the name of a book that will change my life, because i need something new to read, and i dont want to read a book that will just waste my time. Any suggestions? Theres a giant flying bug in my kitchen and its kindof freaking me out.
That is all.